Falling in love and being in a relationship is a wonderful thing. But no relationship is perfect, and they don’t fall apart overnight. Sometimes, it falls apart so gradually you might not even realize it until you feel the resentment streaming out of you. However, upon reviewing this list, you’ll see the things you’re doing that could be harming your relationship.
Your Partner’s Feelings
When someone shares how they feel and you brush it off as if it doesn’t matter, it’s incredibly frustrating, and you feel like you’re not being seen. It makes you feel like they don’t care about your emotions at all. That can kill the emotional connection, and eventually, the person may not want to talk at all because they’ve just given up.
Making Fun Of Them
Teasing in relationships is normal when it’s tender-hearted, caring, and comes from a place of love. However, when you want to hurt the other person’s feelings and you’re doing it on purpose because you think it’s funny, that’s not alright. You’re embarrassing them and hurting them for no reason. You need to stop tearing them down.
Avoiding Talking
Sometimes, you don’t want to talk. It might be easier, at least for you, to avoid the conversation altogether because you feel like you’re keeping the peace, but that doesn’t solve the problem. If anything, it masks the problem because you’re trying to ignore it and avoid dealing with it. Later on, you might find it’s harder to talk about anything.
Mind Reading
No one is a mind reader, and it’s not fair to expect your partner to know what you want if you won’t tell them. This builds frustration because they feel like you’re doing this on purpose and pulling away, even though you’re not, because you’re feeling like you’re pulling away. You feel like they don’t know you and don’t care when they do. You need to talk openly and honestly with each other.
Making Time For Each Other
People in relationships need to spend time together to help the dynamic grow and to become closer. If you’re avoiding each other or are too busy for each other, it sends a message that you don’t care about the relationship. That lets the other person feel like you don’t care. The lack of intentional time will make both of you feel disconnected.
Taking Them For Granted
Another issue in relationships is when you stop noticing the good things your significant other is doing and begin to demand or expect them. The spark starts to fade, and they feel unappreciated. Over time, you stop being thankful and you start assuming something will always happen when it won’t.
Never Apologizing
We all forget to say sorry sometimes, but you should give people the apology they deserve. If you don’t, the wounds won’t heal. An apology shows you care enough to admit that you didn’t mean to hurt them, that you love them, and want to reconnect. Without the ability to apologize, resentment breeds.
Always Being Right
No one is right 24/7. People need to be able to admit they’re wrong. If you can’t, the cost is intimacy and connection. You won’t feel close anymore, and your partner will feel defeated, unheard, and small. It’s hurtful, and it can break people. Admitting you’re wrong will make your relationship thank you for it.
Keeping Score
The past is gone; you can’t change it. Holding on to the past does nothing to help your relationship, and keeping score only brings resentment. You’ll fight more, say hurtful things, and it gets to be too much. You won’t have anything but bitterness, and instead of wanting to spend time together, you’ll avoid each other.
Ignoring Affection
Affection is needed to make a relationship work because it says “I Love You.” Each tiny gesture, loving kiss, and hug all mean something. It shows you care and that you want your partner to feel loved. Physical affection can keep a relationship going longer and can help couples feel that connection again.
Phone
Checking your phone and being on it all the time is a sign that you don’t care about spending time together. You need to stop the scroll and give your partner the attention you’re not giving them. If you can’t, the other person feels invisible, like they’re not worth anything to you, and that you don’t want to be with them.
Never Saying Thank You
Gratitude is important. Imagine cooking for five hours, and your partner looks at it, eats it, and then leaves without saying a word. You’d feel crushed. You need to thank them for things. It makes them feel appreciated and loved. On the flip side, when you don’t thank them, it makes them feel resentful and hurt.
Comparing
No one likes to be compared to others, and relationships where people compare their partners to their exes or family members can be particularly upsetting. It chips away at their confidence and their sense of value. It’s like they’re never enough, and honestly, some people get angry enough to say, “Go back to the ex.”
You’re Not Fine
If you’re not okay, don’t tell people you’re fine. You’re lying to them and yourself, and it’s for no reason. Hiding things doesn’t solve the problem; it masks it. Pretending to be fine builds walls, and eventually, your partner will stop asking if you’re okay because they know you won’t answer honestly.
Grudges
We all get upset, but holding grudges doesn’t do anything except keep resentment alive and create emotional tension that persists. The grudge will sit there and eat at you, poisoning the love you have for each other. Letting go of a grudge doesn’t mean you forget it; you’re just moving on.
Let Your Relationship Heal
With this list of things people do that kill their relationships, you’ll be able to see what you shouldn’t be doing because it’s going to cause you and your partner pain. You don’t have to be in strife every day. Nurture one another and grow together. Learn not to do these things and try not to hurt each other. Just love each other.
