It starts with a swipe. You start talking with this guy and find him charming, intelligent, and charismatic—not to mention his six-pack abs are a turn-on. Pretty soon you’re texting all day and feel a deeper connection develop, to the point where you’re almost ready to say the four-letter word. Online relationships often begin this way. And while it’s easy to get swept up in the romance, some cruel people take advantage of others. These scammers pretend to be someone else, manipulate you, and take your money. Here are 10 tips to help protect you against a broken heart and an empty wallet.
Don’t Give Out Personal Information
This tip should go without saying. Do not share personal information with someone you meet online. A romance scammer will pretend to love you and try to manipulate you into giving them your personal information, such as bank accounts, passwords, or social security numbers. You will protect yourself against fraud if you make this a hard, fast rule.
Be Wary of Overindulgent Flattery
Building up to the three-word phrase “I love you,” a scammer will shower you with dizzying compliments. They’ll tell you that you’re beautiful or that you’re the most amazing person they have ever met. While flattery can be nice, don’t take it to heart, especially if it’s early in the relationship. You two barely know each other, and there’s no way you could have fallen in love that fast. Look past the masquerade and protect yourself.
Keep Your Support System Close
It’s common for friends to report that their starry-eyed friends are more absent than usual. When you start dating, your priorities change, and you’ll likely spend more time chatting with your love interest. Don’t push friends away. Keep them closer. You want them to look out for your best interest, and if they sense something fishy, you want them to speak up. Keep your friends and family involved in your life.
Reverse Image Search
One of the first things you should do when you start an online romance is to do a reverse image search. Scammers will often use pictures from other accounts to pose for them. That means they will not be the person they claim to be. Avoid being “catfished” by an elusive scoundrel. Copy their profile picture and conduct a reverse image search to determine if the picture was pulled from another account.
Hire a Private Investigator
If your relationship is serious and you still can’t tell if you’re being catfished, hire a private investigator. They will have tools and resources you won’t have access to and will be able to confirm or alert you that your online lover is a fraud. They do sophisticated research online and even go out in the field to see the person for themselves. Ask for professional help if you need it.
Take a Video Call
Romance scammers pull from a laundry list of excuses as to why they can’t video chat. They don’t have working internet, or their work went longer than expected, or a family member went to the hospital—if you find them evading multiple requests, it’s time to be suspicious. Someone genuine would not avoid a video call. Look past the facade and oust the scammer.
Do Online Research
This tip is for people who are a little more tech-savvy. If you are familiar with using a computer, conduct some online research. Visit their work’s homepage and see if you can confirm they are current staff. Any specific detail they share needs to be confirmed. You might even want to contact the art school they claimed to have graduated from. It’s one of the only ways that can put your mind at ease.
Never Give Them Money
The “Nigerian Prince” scam has been around since the advent of email. The criminal claims to be royalty and promises their victim an incredible amount of money; all they need is access to your bank account. Do not give money to someone you’re dating online. Adhere to this rule, and you won’t put yourself at risk of potential financial ruin. Scammers will often say something similar or may concoct a false sob story to obtain your money. Your best defense is always to refuse.
Confirm Their Claims
If they claim to have participated in a charity event, check with the organizers to confirm or debunk the claim. They might be making things up to win your heart. They may evoke sympathy, then manipulate you into giving them money. Whenever your online lover references a business, organization, or any other legitimate institution, please contact them. They’ll either break your heart with bad news or validate their existence.
Schedule an In-Person Meet-Up
Our last tip to protect yourself against an online romance scammer is to schedule an in-person meet-up. This is the only way to definitively confirm the person you fell in love with is real. If they are scamming you, they’ll come up with excuses or cancel plans at the last minute. Be diligent and protect yourself against these awful swindlers. Other than that, have fun dating.
